Somewhere Down The Barrel

The other day I had the itch to sketch it out, here was the result:

down the barrelThis was a totally different outcome than my normal sketches of cute things puked into my sketchbook.

When I was in college I had an unhealthy obsession with Daniel Johns from Silverchair. He had a side project called The Dissociatives, which was completely insane to my alternative loving self at the time, but the lyrics really spoke to me.

Here is the video to give you a visual:

Maybe my morning pages have been giving me deep thoughts, but here are a selection of lyrics that were swimming in my head while drawing:

“when everyone’s a stranger
they call for you by your first name
and laugh at jokes you once made
when you were a kid”

“i’m plagued by small town fascists
like a rash on my skin”

“when paintings seem like bargains
but they’re nothing but wallpaper”

The illustration reminds me of myself a long time ago. Kinda quirky, ready for crazy, and usually smiling on the outside. I’ve been thinking a lot about being “grown up” these days, which had me reflecting on the days where people ask you, “Where do you think you’ll be in 10 years?”

Are you where you thought you’d be? Where do you think you’ll be? Something to think about for sure.

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10 thoughts on “Somewhere Down The Barrel

  1. That is such an awesome drawing! I love the line shading + the overall style.

    I am so not where I thought I’d be, but not in a bad way. I was pretty convinced I’d be dating some punk dude and writing. I guess I was half right? As far as the writing goes. Dan is definitely not punk, but that’s probably a good thing, and we’re pretty “normal,” really. Totally bordering on boring. As for ten years from now? Hopefully still writing–but without needing another job–and having a family. Pretty basic, I think.

    • Thanks. I’m not really sure where I thought I’d be at this point. I was pretty random and all over the place growing up. I’ve gone from Dallas Cowboy cheerleader to being a famous musician in an alternative band. But I thought I’d live in Austin or somewhere similar. But I like my simple life, I wouldn’t even mind moving to a smaller town. And I never really thought about being a mom, but I kinda like it 🙂

  2. questions like this make me nervous since I have NO idea where I’ll be in 10 years. I have hopes and dreams of course but I’m one of those people that’s afraid to say anything since I’ll be worried it won’t come true and have to admit…failure! So silly isn’t it?
    xo,
    nancy

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